Sept 20: Our Relationship to Money

 In 2001 a member of our Fellowship proposed a BQ Topic based on people's relationship to money both in the abstract, and as a motivating force in our lives.  The member's name was Bobbye Miller.  She was involved in a book discussion group at that time that selected "Your Money or Your Life" by Joe Dominguez and Vicki Robin.  (I see that the current edition was authored by Vicki Robin and Joe Dominguez published in 2018, but I suspect the edition Bobbye read was similar.)  I have a printed email dated Aug 13, 2001 by Bobbye detailing her proposed discussion talking points that were gleaned from the text.  

She asks questions that she thought would produce a lively discussion, including perspectives like, 

• How did your family deal with money as you grew up?  Did your family consider itself to be well off, or not?  Did your perception of the financial status of your family cause problems at school, for example in making friends?
• Was it considered OK to talk about money in your family, or was it forbidden and secret?  She points out that feelings around money exist at an emotional level for many people, tying people together or driving them apart.
• Are there events in the past that "strongly" affect the way you relate to money?  Bobbye shared that her group, formed of people who were mostly retired at the turn of the century, often shared that they were affected by the Great Depression of the 1930's which occurred when they were young.  Still the memories of that time, and the stories they grew up hearing, made a big impact on how they felt about money.
• Bobbye summarizes the book when she points our several emotional viewpoints: Money as Security:  Money as Power:  Money as Social Acceptance: and Money as Evil.

This topic has the feeling of the Elephant In The Room we all learn to deal with in our own way.  We all need to find a way to deal with the opportunities and pressures caused by the presence or lack of money, in one way or another.  My intent is to deal with this topic without talking about our personal financial situations, but rather to consider it through shared stories and impressions we've gained growing up, and with a certain step back for an abstract perspective.

Here is Gemini's outline for our discussion.  (What would Bobbye think about this?)

Outline for a Discussion on People's Feelings About Money

Introduction

• Icebreaker: Share a personal anecdote or a relevant quote about money.
• Set the tone: Explain the purpose of the discussion and its importance.

Perspectives on Wealth and Poverty

• Defining wealth: What does "wealth" mean to different people?
• Defining poverty: What does "poverty" mean to different people?
• Cultural influences: How do cultural backgrounds and societal norms shape these perspectives?
• Media influence: How do movies, TV shows, and social media portray wealth and poverty?

Family Influences on Money

• Family values: How do family values and beliefs about money shape personal attitudes?
• Role models: Who are the primary financial role models in people's lives?
• Intergenerational wealth: How does family history of wealth or poverty influence current attitudes?
• Financial literacy: Did families provide financial education or guidance?

The Motivation to Work for Money

• Intrinsic vs. extrinsic motivation: What motivates people to work: personal fulfillment or financial gain?
• Work-life balance: How important is money in achieving a satisfying work-life balance?
• Financial security: How does the desire for financial security influence career choices and work ethic?
• Materialism: Is the pursuit of wealth driven by materialism or other factors?

Money and Happiness

• Correlation vs. causation: Does having more money lead to greater happiness?
• Life satisfaction: How does financial status contribute to overall life satisfaction?
• Hedonic treadmill: Does the impact of wealth on happiness diminish over time?
• Meaningful work: How do factors like purpose and fulfillment contribute to happiness?

Financial Challenges and Opportunities

• Debt and financial stress: Discuss common financial challenges people face.
• Financial planning: Explore strategies for managing money effectively.
• Investing and wealth creation: Discuss opportunities for building wealth.
• Giving back: Explore the role of philanthropy and charitable giving.

Conclusion

• Summarize key points: Recap the main themes and insights from the discussion.
• Encourage further reflection: Invite participants to continue exploring their own relationship with money.

Additional Considerations:

• Facilitate open and honest discussions: Create a safe and supportive environment for sharing perspectives.
• Use relevant examples and case studies: Illustrate points with real-world examples.
• Encourage group participation: Ensure everyone has an opportunity to contribute.
• Consider diverse viewpoints: Acknowledge and respect different perspectives.

By following this outline and engaging participants in thoughtful conversation, you can foster a deeper understanding of people's feelings about money and its impact on their lives.