Oct 11: What makes a good life?

 As I traveled through the Boston airport on Monday there were advertisements for a new AI called claude.ai.  I accessed it and have been experimenting with it a bit, comparing the responses I get from Claude to the ones from Gemini, the Google AI open language model I have been using for several months now.  Below I have copied the response to my standard request for a discussion topic for adult learners in an open discussion group.  I have retained the Facilitator Notes for your consideration, especially noting that that the best possible comment may be a question rather than a statement.  Get people thinking by asking good questions, and ultimately you may lead to a breakthrough in your own way of considering the topic.

We've tackled this topic in many forms over the years.  The Socratic Question behind this topic might be, "What is satisfaction in your life?" or something like it.  We've talked about the idea of pleasure as a life goal, and I think most people disregard that as a worthy goal for a variety of reasons.  If we take a step back and ask, what are the elements of everyday living that we aspire to promote and/or seek out?  If we can name them, and if we can judge them against some sort of quality scale such as are they ethical, are they honorable, and are they universal, might we be able to put together an outline of living a "good life" where we, and the people around us, can share in the benefits of this sort of living?

What Makes a "Good Life" in Today's World?

A Socratic Exploration for Adult Discussion Groups

Session Overview

• Duration: 90 minutes
• Group Size: 6-12 participants
• Setting: Comfortable, informal setting where all participants can see each other

Facilitator Notes

Remember: Your role is not to provide answers but to guide discussion through questioning. Allow silence after questions - it gives people time to think.

Opening (10 minutes)

• Welcome participants
• Ground rules:
  • There are no "right" answers
  • Listen actively to others
  • Build on others' thoughts
  • Challenge ideas, not people
  • Personal examples are welcome

Initial Question (15 minutes)

Begin with: "When you hear someone say they're 'living their best life,' what does that mean to you?"

Follow-up questions:

• "Can someone give an example of when they felt they were living their best life?"
• "What made that moment special?"
• "Did anyone have a different type of experience?"

Deeper Exploration (45 minutes)

Theme 1: Success vs. Happiness

• "Is being successful the same as being happy?"
• "Can someone be successful but unhappy? Happy but not successful?"
• "Who decides what success means?"

Theme 2: Modern Challenges

• "How has social media changed our view of a 'good life'?"
• "Are we more or less satisfied than previous generations? Why?"
• "What pressures do we face today that our grandparents didn't?"

Theme 3: Personal Values

• "If you could guarantee one thing in your life, what would it be?"
• "What do you value more: peace of mind or achievement?"
• "Has what you consider a 'good life' changed as you've gotten older?"

Synthesis (15 minutes)

• "What have we learned from each other today?"
• "Has anyone's view of what makes a 'good life' shifted during our discussion?"
• "What questions are you still wrestling with?"

Closing (5 minutes)

• Summarize key insights
• Thank participants
• Optional: Suggest a personal reflection exercise for the week

Possible Follow-up Topics for Future Sessions

• The role of community in a good life
• Balance between personal and professional life
• The impact of technology on human happiness
• Material wealth vs. personal fulfillment
• The relationship between purpose and happiness

Sept 20: Our Relationship to Money

 In 2001 a member of our Fellowship proposed a BQ Topic based on people's relationship to money both in the abstract, and as a motivating force in our lives.  The member's name was Bobbye Miller.  She was involved in a book discussion group at that time that selected "Your Money or Your Life" by Joe Dominguez and Vicki Robin.  (I see that the current edition was authored by Vicki Robin and Joe Dominguez published in 2018, but I suspect the edition Bobbye read was similar.)  I have a printed email dated Aug 13, 2001 by Bobbye detailing her proposed discussion talking points that were gleaned from the text.  

She asks questions that she thought would produce a lively discussion, including perspectives like, 

• How did your family deal with money as you grew up?  Did your family consider itself to be well off, or not?  Did your perception of the financial status of your family cause problems at school, for example in making friends?
• Was it considered OK to talk about money in your family, or was it forbidden and secret?  She points out that feelings around money exist at an emotional level for many people, tying people together or driving them apart.
• Are there events in the past that "strongly" affect the way you relate to money?  Bobbye shared that her group, formed of people who were mostly retired at the turn of the century, often shared that they were affected by the Great Depression of the 1930's which occurred when they were young.  Still the memories of that time, and the stories they grew up hearing, made a big impact on how they felt about money.
• Bobbye summarizes the book when she points our several emotional viewpoints: Money as Security:  Money as Power:  Money as Social Acceptance: and Money as Evil.

This topic has the feeling of the Elephant In The Room we all learn to deal with in our own way.  We all need to find a way to deal with the opportunities and pressures caused by the presence or lack of money, in one way or another.  My intent is to deal with this topic without talking about our personal financial situations, but rather to consider it through shared stories and impressions we've gained growing up, and with a certain step back for an abstract perspective.

Here is Gemini's outline for our discussion.  (What would Bobbye think about this?)

Outline for a Discussion on People's Feelings About Money

Introduction

• Icebreaker: Share a personal anecdote or a relevant quote about money.
• Set the tone: Explain the purpose of the discussion and its importance.

Perspectives on Wealth and Poverty

• Defining wealth: What does "wealth" mean to different people?
• Defining poverty: What does "poverty" mean to different people?
• Cultural influences: How do cultural backgrounds and societal norms shape these perspectives?
• Media influence: How do movies, TV shows, and social media portray wealth and poverty?

Family Influences on Money

• Family values: How do family values and beliefs about money shape personal attitudes?
• Role models: Who are the primary financial role models in people's lives?
• Intergenerational wealth: How does family history of wealth or poverty influence current attitudes?
• Financial literacy: Did families provide financial education or guidance?

The Motivation to Work for Money

• Intrinsic vs. extrinsic motivation: What motivates people to work: personal fulfillment or financial gain?
• Work-life balance: How important is money in achieving a satisfying work-life balance?
• Financial security: How does the desire for financial security influence career choices and work ethic?
• Materialism: Is the pursuit of wealth driven by materialism or other factors?

Money and Happiness

• Correlation vs. causation: Does having more money lead to greater happiness?
• Life satisfaction: How does financial status contribute to overall life satisfaction?
• Hedonic treadmill: Does the impact of wealth on happiness diminish over time?
• Meaningful work: How do factors like purpose and fulfillment contribute to happiness?

Financial Challenges and Opportunities

• Debt and financial stress: Discuss common financial challenges people face.
• Financial planning: Explore strategies for managing money effectively.
• Investing and wealth creation: Discuss opportunities for building wealth.
• Giving back: Explore the role of philanthropy and charitable giving.

Conclusion

• Summarize key points: Recap the main themes and insights from the discussion.
• Encourage further reflection: Invite participants to continue exploring their own relationship with money.

Additional Considerations:

• Facilitate open and honest discussions: Create a safe and supportive environment for sharing perspectives.
• Use relevant examples and case studies: Illustrate points with real-world examples.
• Encourage group participation: Ensure everyone has an opportunity to contribute.
• Consider diverse viewpoints: Acknowledge and respect different perspectives.

By following this outline and engaging participants in thoughtful conversation, you can foster a deeper understanding of people's feelings about money and its impact on their lives.

Sept 6: Humanist Manifesto

*** UPDATE ***

I have been going through old documents in my home files that pertain to BQ topics we used 20+ years ago.  In the beauty of the bounty that philosophy essentially is, these topics are as pertinent and  interesting today as they were then.  So, in the spirit of the ideal that no idea ever dies or goes away I am resurrecting a topic from 2001 and adding some more current references and links to help my current participants enjoy the environment we created then, transported to today.

Humanist Manifesto

In an effort to provide some context and a quick summary, here is a link to the Wiki page that covers Humanist Manifestos I, II, and III, and links to others that are based on the same concepts.  HMI dates from 1933 and outlines an optimistic worldview based on human cooperation and lives of service to others.  HMII dates from 1973, and recasts the wording and key points in a way that takes into consideration of the world's horrors of the 1940's and before while not abandoning the optimism of the first version.  HMIII was written by a committee in 2003 and originally signed by 22 Nobel laureates, but later the number of names of signatories swelled into the thousands.

When you read through the Wiki summary of the different versions certain elements included in them are based on philosophical points of view we have covered in the past.  Certainly atheism, but existentialism and self-determination are strongly stated.  The number of points that each of the manifestos use seems declines with each iteration, going from 34 to 17 to 6, but broadening in scope and reach of each at the same time.  Please look these over and consider where your personal philosophy is in alignment or opposition to each.

The link for the HMIII document will take you to the American Humanist Association, an organization that embraces all three of these versions, and has links to others as well.  They provide a wealth of information if this is a topic that resonates with you, as it does for me.

Recall that we are back to meeting at the Smith's home at 6:30 for a potluck dinner followed by the discussion at 8:00.  I hope to see you there!

Original Blog:

So, how has your summer been going?  Anything new going on in your lives?  I've had a few changes in my life, mostly medical in nature making me better able to deal with the life I plan to live these next few decades, so I am paying it forward.  Invest in health issues today to be able to reap the benefits later.  It seems a good strategy.

As September nears I have started looking at my calendar, thinking about BQ meetings again.  It looks like Sept 6 and 20 are open, so let's put those dates on the calendar.  Judy and I have a trip planned at the end of the month which pushes the BQ meetings to this schedule in September, but limits the meeting dates in October to only 1 open date, Oct 18.  Alli, can you add these dates to the shared calendar?

Keep updated on this site for the announcement of the discussion topic we will use for Sept 6, and beyond.  I felt that getting the calendar set was a good first step, with topics to follow.

June 14: How does aging change us?

 I have been going through old files and came across papers I have saved since the late 90's of BQ topics and reference materials.  It is a trove of ideas and documents from 25+ years ago, and not the Socratic topics I generally favor today but many of practical and personal importance.  Here is a partial running list:  the challenges of being an adolescent in modern times, is there a culture of youth violence, the pressures of mid-life transitions and crises, marital satisfaction and aging, and family relationships and how they change as we age.  There seems to be a theme here, of dealing with the changes that occur as we move through the arc that is our life.  If the metaphor we use for life is an arc, it suggests that the high point is somewhere near the middle?  At the turn of the century I was in my mid-40s, presumably somewhere near that apex, so this may have been the motivation for dealing with these sorts of topics.

Now, on the doorstep of becoming 70, my priorities and perspectives have changed.  The topics listed above mostly look inwards towards the core of each of us as individuals, seeking to understand the changes that occur within us.  How do outside forces (society, culture, the internet, Amazon, just to name a few) affect how we feel about ourselves, and how do they change what we feel are the important things in life?  I have long advocated that each of us are on a journey to find ourselves, and to "become who we really are".  Are we all "older and wiser" than we were 25 years ago?  Are we more in tune to who we are?

No AI info this session.  Let's do it on our own.

May 24: In Memorial for Lives Well Lived

 Can we remember our loved ones on Memorial Day in a way that allows us to more fully understand ourselves and the lives we currently lead?  As I have been considering this idea, I recall a play I had a role in during High School in Durham, NH, and the powerful scene where some of the living characters visit the cemetery and cry for the deceased, missing them.  I asked Gemini, the AI, for their insight.

<Des>  In Thornton Wilder's play Our Town, characters that represent dead ancestors are seated in chairs arranged to represent a cemetery. The characters see the suffering of the living and comment that the living just "don't understand" how the overall system works. Can you provide some insight to this scene?

<Gemini>  In the final act of Our Town, the scene with the dead ancestors in the cemetery offers a powerful commentary on life and death. Here's some insight:

• Limited Perspective of the Living: The living characters in Our Town are caught up in the daily grind – marriages, arguments, small joys, and heartbreaks. They experience life linearly, moment by moment. The dead, however, have a broader perspective. They can see the entire life cycle, the joys and sorrows in their entirety.

• Acceptance vs. Regret: The dead characters seem to have reached a state of acceptance about life's limitations. They understand the inevitability of death and the cyclical nature of existence. This can be seen as a contrast to the living, who often grapple with regret, longing, and a fear of the unknown.

• The Importance of the Ordinary: The play emphasizes the beauty and significance of seemingly ordinary moments. The dead characters seem to understand this more than the living. They might be commenting on how the living take these moments for granted, caught up in anxieties about the future or dwelling on the past.

• Universality of Experience: By placing the dead characters together, Wilder removes social distinctions. A farmer, a doctor, a laborer – all share the same fate. This reinforces the play's theme of universality – that life and death are common experiences that connect us all.

"Don't understand" doesn't imply judgment. It's a recognition of the different vantage points of the living and the dead. The dead have transcended the limitations of human life and can see the bigger picture.

This scene is a core part of Our Town's message. It encourages us, the living, to appreciate the simple moments of life, to find meaning in the ordinary, and to accept the cycle of life and death. <End>

May 10: Global Radical Feminism

 After our last session someone suggested to me privately that BQ might want to consider talking about social movements in other countries, not unlike our topic of having a moral basis to judge other cultures.  The person suggested we talk about a movement that is getting a lot of press in Korea called the 4B movement.  I didn't know anything about it so I did a little research, which is offered below in my usual give and take with Gemini, the Google AI I prefer.

In the questions I posed to Gemini I attempted to draw out both the surface issues involved, and also some of the underlying social, economic and demographic issues that might be fueling the debate, if not forming the base of the movements themselves.  I recall my mother's involvement in feminism in the late 1960's and early 70's which had a much milder platform of ideas and topics than those attributed to the current 4B group, but with a similar underlying goal of raising the status of women.  I only mention this because this may be a case where very different cultures share a common set of underlying values even though it may not appear to be the case.  It is all about who is in charge.  Patriarchy, matriarchy, or egalitarianism.

Well, is there a Big Question we can address that covers this broad topic?  At the bottom of the blog today is a list of definitions of patriarchy, matriarchy, egalitarianism and feminism.  Is the point of the social movements listed here the establishment of a matriarchy, or to achieve some movement towards egalitarianism?  Is the 4B movement a version of radical feminism, or something more? 

<Des>  Give me some background on the Korean 4B movement. Is this a protest by women in Korea against the traditional male-dominated society? Is there more going on here than that?

<Gemini>  You're right, the 4B movement in South Korea is a reaction to a traditional, male-dominated society, but there's more to it. Here's a breakdown:

• Core Beliefs: 4B stands for four Korean words, each starting with "bi":

  • Bihon (no marriage)
  • Bichulsan (no childbirth)
  • Biyeonae (no dating)
  • Bisekseu (no heterosexual sex)

• Origins and Purpose: The movement emerged in the mid-2010s, initially against societal pressure to marry. It gained momentum around 2018 due to a rise in spycam incidents (secretly filming women) and frustration with a patriarchal culture. Proponents see 4B as a way to:

  • Resist societal expectations placed on women
  • Live life on their own terms, free from male dominance
  • Push for broader gender equality

• Impact: It's difficult to gauge the movement's size, but it's likely in the low thousands. However, it's sparked discussions about feminism and societal pressures on women in Korea. Some argue it's also contributing to South Korea's very low birth rate.

• Nuances: The movement is considered radical feminism. It doesn't represent all Korean feminists, and some criticize its potentially exclusionary nature towards women who want relationships with men.

In short, the 4B movement is a complex response to South Korea's social structure. It's a protest against traditional gender roles, but also a call for broader societal change.

<Des> Are there similar movements in other countries, such as Japan?

<Gemini>  While there isn't a directly equivalent movement in Japan with the exact same goals and name as the 4B movement in South Korea, there are definitely movements in Japan that address similar issues of gender equality and societal pressures on women. Here's what you might find:

• Historical Context: Japan has a long history of patriarchal structures, though feminist movements have emerged since the early 20th century. Unlike Korea, Japan might not have such a recent, concentrated movement focused on boycotting marriage and relationships.

• Modern Movements: Japan does have feminist movements that address similar themes as 4B. Look into movements like:

  • Women's Liberation Movement (1960s-present)
  • Equal Employment Opportunity Movement (1980s-present)
  • #KuToo movement (2019): Opposed mandatory high heels in workplaces.

• Focus Differences: While Korean 4B focuses on boycotting marriage and relationships, Japanese movements might target specific aspects of gender inequality, like workplace discrimination or societal expectations on appearance.

Resources: It might be helpful to search for these movements online, but be mindful of using reliable sources. You can try searching for terms like "Japanese feminist movements" or "women's rights movements in Japan.

<Des>  Asian birthrates in counties like Japan, Korea, and China have been falling, with some observers saying that a looming labor shortage will result. These societies have norms that include eldest son's having responsibility for taking care of aged parents, for example, but the widespread reduction in the number of younger people being available to work and support older generations is a real concern. Can the 4B and similar movements leverage this shift in demographics to raise the status of women in these societies?

<Gemini>  It's certainly possible that the 4B movement and similar movements could leverage the demographic shift to raise the status of women in these societies. Here's why:

• Labor Shortage Bargaining Chip: As birthrates decline and the workforce shrinks, women become a more valuable part of the labor pool. This could give them leverage to negotiate for better working conditions, equal pay, and more flexibility – things movements like 4B advocate for.

• Government Incentives: Faced with a shrinking workforce, governments might be more likely to implement policies that encourage women to stay in the workforce, such as affordable childcare or parental leave for both fathers and mothers. This could help dismantle some of the traditional gender roles that hold women back.

• Shifting Family Dynamics: With fewer children per family, the traditional expectation of eldest sons taking care of parents might weaken. This could lead to a more equitable sharing of caregiving responsibilities between genders.

However, there are also challenges to consider:

• Resistance to Change: Traditional social norms and expectations can be deeply ingrained. There may be resistance to policies that empower women or redefine family structures.

• Economic Pressures: Financial insecurity can force women to stay in jobs with poor working conditions even if they want to leave.

• Focus on Numbers, Not Rights: Governments might prioritize increasing birth rates over addressing gender inequality. They could implement policies encouraging childbirth without tackling the underlying reasons women choose not to have children.

Overall, the demographic shift presents an opportunity for feminist movements to push for change. The success will depend on:

• Movement Strategy: Can they effectively connect the issue of low birth rates to the need for gender equality?
• Government Policies: Will governments address the root causes of low birth rates and create a more supportive environment for working women?
• Societal Shift: Are there broader cultural changes happening that support a more equitable future?

The 4B movement and similar movements can play a crucial role in influencing these factors.

<Des>  Define patriarchy, matriarchy, egalitarianism and feminism.

<Gemini>  Here's a breakdown of the four terms:

Patriarchy:

• A social system where men hold primary power in political, economic, and social spheres.
• Men typically hold positions of leadership in families, governments, and businesses.
• Women are often expected to take subordinate roles, like caregivers or homemakers.

Matriarchy:

• Often thought of as the opposite of patriarchy, with women holding primary power.
• However, unlike patriarchy, which is a well-documented social structure, there's little evidence of true matriarchies existing historically.
• Some societies may have strong female leadership roles, but complete female dominance is rare.

Egalitarianism:

• A social system that strives for equality between genders (and often other social groups).
• Power and decision-making are ideally shared equally, regardless of sex or gender identity.
• Egalitarianism promotes equal access to opportunities, resources, and political participation.

Feminism is a collection of ideas and movements that share a common goal: achieving political, economic, personal, and social equality of the sexes. Here's a breakdown of its key aspects:

• Equality Focus: Feminism works to dismantle systems that give advantages to one gender over another. This can include legal inequalities, social norms that limit opportunities, or economic structures that disadvantage women.
• Spectrum of Beliefs: There isn't a single, monolithic feminism. Different feminist movements and theorists have different approaches and priorities. Some might focus on legal equality (like voting rights), while others might address social issues like body image or sexual harassment.
• Challenging Patriarchy: Many feminist movements see patriarchy, the social system where men hold primary power, as a major obstacle to equality. They work to dismantle these structures and create a more equitable society.
• Beyond Gender Binary: While historically focused on women's rights, some contemporary feminism acknowledges the spectrum of genders and sexualities. It advocates for equality for everyone, regardless of gender identity or sexual orientation.

Here are some additional points to consider:

• Social Change: Feminism is a social movement that aims to change societal norms and institutions. It's not just about individual empowerment, but about creating a more just world for everyone.
• Ongoing Struggle: Achieving true gender equality is a complex and ongoing process. Feminist movements continue to work towards this goal in various ways, from activism and lobbying to scholarship and education.

I hope this helps! Let me know if you have any other questions.

April 26: Cultural Relativism

Late Breaking News

In a move back towards the past, we are reinstating the practice of holding the Big Questions in our home, starting with a pot-luck dinner at 6:30, followed by discussion at 8:00.  If you need the address or directions please contact me directly.  There will be an attempt to have a computer in use for the usual Zoom Meeting Access starting around the 8:00 hour if that is your preference.  

The potluck dinner has been a key feature of in-person BQ meetings in the pass.  People are free to bring any dinner item they like, generally in the categories of main dishes or casseroles, salads, bread and/or cheese, and desserts.  All dinnerware is provided, as are serving spoons and other normal necessaries (salt and pepper, butter, etc.).  This is a BYOB event, so please bring something you like.  Water, iced tea, and coffee are provided by the hosts.

The potluck is optional.  If people want to attend only for the discussion, that is perfectly acceptable.  Look for the Big Question mark at the end of the driveway.

<Des>  Are we justified in judging activities and practices in other cultures and societies?  Do the social norms we accept for ourselves give us the moral authority to judge others against our standards?

<Gemini> This is a great question for your philosophy group! There are two main approaches to consider:

Cultural Relativism:

• This perspective argues against judging other cultures based on your own standards.
• Every culture has its own set of beliefs, values, and practices that make sense within its own context.
• Judging another culture is like judging an apple for being a bad orange; they are different things with different purposes.

Challenges to Cultural Relativism:

• Universal Values: Many argue there are basic human rights and values that transcend cultures, such as the right to life and freedom from torture.
• Ignoring Harmful Practices: Cultural relativism could be used to justify practices like female genital mutilation or child marriage.

Finding Balance:

• Understanding vs. Condone: We can strive to understand another culture's practices without condoning them.
• Focus on Universal Values: Use internationally recognized human rights principles to identify practices that cause significant harm.
• Dialogue and Openness: Encourage communication and exchange of ideas between cultures to find common ground.

Discussion Prompts:

• Can a culture's practices be harmful without violating basic human rights?
• Is there a way to critique harmful practices without imposing your own values?
• How can we balance respect for cultural differences with the protection of human well-being?
• What are the limits of cultural relativism?

By exploring both sides of the argument, your philosophy group can delve deeper into the complexities of cultural interaction and how to approach potentially conflicting practices.